According to a recent article, making a marriage work involves implementing strategies that are exclusive of the original design for marriage. Husbands are the primary cornerstone for a happy relationship between a man and a woman. Husbands can make their marriage work by placing a premium on the original design for marriage.
According to the article, for those who are married, the reality that relationships are hard can be tough to navigate as well. Just as not everyone chooses to get married, there are those who choose to commit to a life-long relationship, despite the difficulties that will inevitably come.
Making marriage satisfying, especially when one is committed to making it work, can often be a frustrating struggle. But it doesn’t always have to be that way, or at least not as daunting as some make it out to be. Just as Bolick seeks to ease the burden of women in the single life, there are those who think making marriage work can be easier than many believe.
“No marriage is an island,” she wrote last week. “Two people can’t always lift a marriage on their own shoulders,” which is why friends and family can be such an important part of any couple’s journey.
Constantly re-evaluating one’s perspective is another important part of making a marriage work. In an article for Psychology Today, Kate Fridkis cited the common problem of simply having unrealistic expectations as a real threat to happy marriages.
“The problem is that we have this mold in the shape of a fairytale, and we’re all trying to cram our sloppy, oozy lives into it, but there’s always some spilling out the sides, getting everything sticky,” she wrote. “We have this image of happily ever stuck in our heads,” and too often it just gets in the way.
If people want their marriages to weather the natural storms that come with any committed relationship, overcoming those obstacles are an important starting point. It may not always be easy, but according to Fridkis the outcome is rewarding.
Men can make their marriage by adhering to the original design for marriage which includes the husband as a servant to god, a good steward over the resources that God provides, and following god’s instructions.
The Servant Husband
According to Genesis 2:15, God placed Adam in the Garden of Eden to be a servant. The Bible has a great deal to say about servanthood because the central theme of the Bible is the Servant of all—Jesus Christ. “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many” (Mark 10:45). When we give Jesus Christ His rightful place as Lord of our lives, His lordship will be expressed in the way we serve others (Mark 9:35; 1 Peter 4:10; John 15:12-13).
A Servant is:
- Thankful (Romans 1:8)
- Prayerful (Romans 1:9)
- Submitted (Romans 1:10)
- Giving (Roans 1:11)
- Humble (Romans 1:12)
The Good Steward
A steward is one who has been given the responsibility to manage or care for someone or something. He’s not the owner. The steward is simply the caretaker. He’s the manager of property belonging to another. As a result, the steward is accountable to the actual owner.
The Bible says that God is the owner of everything and that he gives humanity a stewardship to care for and manage his gifts. Our lives are to be comprehensively God-Centered. God owns everything. We do not. Everything is ultimately for God, not us.
Walking in Obedience
According to Genesis 2: 16-17, God told Adam what he could and could not do. Following God’s instructions requires obedience.
The Bible has much to say about obedience. In fact, obedience is the essence of the Christian faith. Jesus Himself was “obedient unto death, even death on a cross” (Philippians 2:8). For Christians, the act of taking up our cross and following Him (Matthew 16:24) means obedience. The Bible makes it clear that we show our love for Jesus by obeying Him in all things: “If you love Me, keep My commandments” (John 14:15). Obedience is defined as “dutifully complying with the commands, orders, or instructions of one in authority.” Using this definition, we see the elements of biblical obedience. “Dutifully” means it is our obligation to obey God, just as Jesus fulfilled His duty to the Father by dying on the cross for our sin. “Commands, orders or instructions” speaks to the Scriptures in which God has clearly outlined His commandments and His will. “One in authority” is God Himself, whose authority is total and unequivocal. For the Christian, obedience means complying with everything God has commanded because it is our duty to do so. Having said that, it is important to understand that it is the spirit of obedience, not the act of obedience, that is important. The Pharisees relentlessly pursued acts of obedience to the law and by doing so became self-righteous, believing that they deserved to go to heaven by what they had done. Heaven, to them, was a reward owed to them for their good deeds, but the Bible tells us that, to God, all our righteous works are as “filthy rags” (Isaiah 64:6). The obedience that was lacking in the Pharisees was brought to light by Jesus, who exposed their heart attitude. Their hypocrisy in obeying the “letter of the law,” but not the spirit of it, characterized their lives, and Jesus rebuked them sharply for it: “Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs, which indeed appear beautiful outside, but inside they are full of dead men’s bones, and of all uncleanness. Even so you also appear righteous to men outwardly, but inside you are full of hypocrisy and iniquity” (Matthew 23:27-28).
If we love God, we will obey Him, not always and not perfectly, but our desire is to obey Him and our lives give evidence of that desire. When we love God and obey Him, we naturally have love for one another. Obedience is commanded by God, not only because it glorifies Him when we obey, but because it is the best for us. Obedience brings joy, comfort and peace in a world where such things are hard to find, mainly due to disobedience and rejection of God and His Word.
Husbands who desire to make their marriage work will willfully follow God’s original design for marriage by becoming as servant, a good steward, and obeying God.
Dr. Derrick and Mrs. Sheila Campbell PO Box 1668 Blackwood, NJ 08012 (856) 566-3267 www.advancedmarriagetraining.com
Published books – Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land -Leading Your Marriage into the Promised Land (Workbook for husbands & Wives) – Advanced Marriage Training for Singles
“I was blessed by the love and sensitivity that you and your wife showed during the presentation”.
Bishop Joseph P. Ravenell
Samaritan Baptist Church
Trenton, NJ “I would highly recommend you to any church or organization desiring to provide their people with timely marital wisdom and practical application skills”.
Dr. James E. Woods, II
El Shaddia Christian Assembly